Ask God

[paultheprincess]

An Ankylosaur cast an aspersion upon my mother. I'm fully aware that I have no mother, but it was the principal of the thing.
Hey God, do you ever get lonely?

[Valgee]

I compare my social life to yours and feel much better if I ever do.

What happens if someone really into BDSM goes to Heaven?

[zomgmouse]

S/he joins the rest of us.

Do you like strawberries?

[Valgee]

That's how I decide who goes to Hell, actually.

What's up, God?

[TheMaskThatSmiles]

when will you guys learn that "up," as a subjective direction, has no meaning to an omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent deity

Where ARE the wild things?

[paultheprincess]

In my pants.

Hey God, what's your drug of choice?

[Valgee]

Lambs. I miss when people used to burn them for me. You all should start that again.

Dear God,
When will you stop?

[zomgmouse]

I stopped ages ago.

Do you wear underpants?

[trillicat]

You're looking up my skirt all the time as it is. Can't you tell?


Skydaddykins, how come you never give me cake or presents on my birthday?

[paultheprincess]

Well when my birthday rolls around, you're all too busy giving cake and presents to one another to bother about me. Thanks a lot you guys.
Hey God, I get the feeling you were bullied a lot at school. Hence the complex?

[zomgmouse]

No, my complex is Oedipal. I screwed my mum and became my dad, remember?

Do you eat?

[Valgee]

I drink. A lot. You people.. you people worry me. I mean.. what if your art raped your other art?

Hey, God, what's this thing you made grow out of me?

[trillicat]

That tiny little thing? Don't worry about it. No one will even notice it's there. Just keep your pants up.


GodGod, will you give me lots of money?

[zomgmouse]

Of course! Only I've lost track of what you're up to now. Five dollars is a lot, right?

Dear God, what's your favourite name for yourself?