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King of the Hill

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Re: King of the Hill

Postby trillicat » Wed Jun 16, 2010 1:13 pm

I set your theater on fire. While you run to protect your assets, I usurp the hill.

My hill.
Spoiler:
Ovaries! Lawlz!
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Mithras » Wed Jun 16, 2010 3:09 pm

I sue you for burning the theatre which I was busy trying to claim off the playwright in the aforementioned legal case. Naturally I demand the hill in compensation for not getting the compensation. It's amazing what lawyers can do nowadays.

My hill.

Edited to add some full stops.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Wed Jun 16, 2010 6:27 pm

"The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." - Dick the Butcher, King Henry IV

Did you know that that quote is in reference to greasing the wheels of revolution?

You slide down the hill on the blood slick left by your ex-lawyers. Revolution completed.

My hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby gunner921 » Wed Jun 16, 2010 8:47 pm

I hire dog the bounty hunter to collect the bounty now on your head for the murder of the lawyers you go into hiding

MY Hill
I fought the law and the llama won
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby zomgmouse » Wed Jun 16, 2010 10:30 pm

The RSPCA arrests you for hiring animals as bounty hunters.

My hill.
I like my coffee like my people: I don't.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Thu Jun 17, 2010 11:35 am

Bad news. This hill is in Scotland. I've just incited a revolution by stoking the latent anger of the northern populace regarding English animal cruelty laws. When they notice your cricketer ass trying to claim this most Scottish of hills, they send a large force of drunken, skirted yobbos to evict you. Coincidentally, I've just come from an SCA 'Braveheart' party, so my accent is spot on, and my Tartan is properly worn. Same said drunken, skirted yobbos mistake me for old Scottish nobility and build me a castle.

My fortified hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby gunner921 » Sun Jun 20, 2010 8:17 pm

I comeback with my new prisoner friends, who also happen to be vikings, we sack your castle, and toss you down the hill.

My now viking protected Hill
I fought the law and the llama won
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby trillicat » Sun Jun 20, 2010 9:21 pm

I tell the vikings about another land they haven't yet discovered that is full of natural resources. They leave, taking you prisoner "just in case".


My hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby zomgmouse » Mon Jun 21, 2010 7:50 am

I tell the Vikings you were lying. They come back and do unpleasant Vikingy things to you, and reward me with the hill.

The hill.
I like my coffee like my people: I don't.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Mithras » Mon Jun 21, 2010 9:37 am

I wave a hisotry book at the vikings and berate them for not being proper vikings and refusing to trade. Suitably embarassed they sail off to Russia then on to the Middle east where they become rich. Of course they were slaver traders too, have fun scrubbing floors in Constantinople!

My vikingless hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Mon Jun 21, 2010 11:33 am

I travel to the town of Battle Creek, Michigan, where I use the dark necromantic arts to raise Zombie Sojourner Truth. I tell her that you have been encouraging the slave trade, and she flies into action. Ten minutes later, a tunnel opens underneath your feet and you are pulled under the earth, where she liberates your brains.

I skirt around the edge of the carnage, climb out of the hole and enjoy the view from the top of...

My hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby gunner921 » Mon Jun 21, 2010 6:41 pm

While you were in Michigan you pissed off the Wolverines, not the football team, but the communist liberators who happen to be vacationing there, Me being freed after the vikings left me, I find the pissed off group and lead them to liberate the hill in 1980's fashion.

My Hill.
I fought the law and the llama won
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Thu Jun 24, 2010 5:38 pm

Always having wanted to see a sequel to that movie, I go about making one, this time with the Chinese as the antagonists. Sadly, the recent death of Patrick Swayze leaves the WOLVERINES! too weakened to get the job done. In thanks for this unexpected windfall of foreign hill country, the Party grants me status, citizenship, and a job overseeing the new acquisition.

The Peoples Republic of My Hill
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby zomgmouse » Fri Jun 25, 2010 4:36 am

The God of Apostrophes is angered.

My hill.
I like my coffee like my people: I don't.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Mon Jul 19, 2010 5:41 pm

I whip a group of militant atheists into a furor regarding your theocratic grammar policing. They charge up, bore you to death, and then wander off to smugly self-congratulate.

My Hill
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Zetta » Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:25 am

I eat your brains. you wander off a few minutes later in search of brains for yourself.

My hill
Hell is where the heart is
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby gunner921 » Tue Jul 20, 2010 2:52 pm

I hit you upside the head with a cricket bat, MY HILL
I fought the law and the llama won
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ambition » Tue Jul 20, 2010 4:01 pm

I slap you, then walk off the hill.
Meanwhile, you are too confused to see my army charging you on the other side of the hill.

My Hill.
Oh hey Jesus, sorry about Thursday.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby paultheprincess » Wed Jul 21, 2010 1:59 am

I slowly erode your confidence through pointed remarks and condescending expressions until you finally require years of therapy to restore you to even a shell of your former self. You give up the hill to me because, let's face it, we both know you're not worthy.

My Hill.
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Re: King of the Hill

Postby Snarkalicious » Wed Jul 21, 2010 12:06 pm

I Beige Box the hill's phone line and call in a bomb threat. Send me a postcard from Guantanamo. You can address it to...

My Hill.
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