The Best Way to Deal With People Who Don't Believe in Unicorns

First off, yes, I know narwhals technically have tusks, not horns, but, hey, their Latin name is Monodon monoceros, meaning "one-tooth one-horn" or "one-toothed unicorn," which I think gestures toward the fact that if you get impaled on a ten foot-long death-spike coming out of an animal's face, you probably won't worry if it's protruding from the skull plate or jaw.

Anyway, this just makes me think that the dual-wielding Narwhalbarian should definitely be a D&D prestige class available to the Barbarian.